Limbo

I've be pretty quiet lately on the blog (really since about May). I have had several e-mails requesting that I end my tight-lipped stale mate and start writing again. Well, the truth is- If you know much about me, you know that when any one aspect of my life is uncertain, I, like a turtle, hide deep inside my shell. Only, unlike a turtle I keep walking forward-with shaking feet- waiting for something bad to happen, but believing that if I just keep walking, somehow, all of the uncertainty will clear. All right, so it's not my finer characteristic, but it's my version of bravery.

Life involves risks. Greatness requires it, even thrives on it. Not random, stupid risks. But thoughtful, well calculated risks with good backup plans .

When I decided to go to Penn State, I took a HUGE risk. (Huge Risk is defined as up to 40k dollars and no social life at the same time.) But I knew it was the right thing- and I have NEVER regreted it. I ended up paying 20k, but it was WELL worth it. I now have an incredibly unique and marketable set of skills. If I could do it all again, I would, only this time, I wouldn't be so scared.

Well, in Dave's "spare time" (a.k.a., the time "left over"/ squeezed out/ created in the tiny crevaces between working full time, going to school full time, being a brand new dad and an excellent husband, and being elders quorum president), he has been working on a project for quite a while now. It's really the kind of top-knotch work that few people can produce. Dave is an artist at heart, he LOVES to create. And he's really good at it. He's had someone marketing and using his computer program for quite a while now.

At the same time, Dave's primary employer (now previous employer) was really limiting the scope of items Dave could create in that environment. He had created for them an incredible product, which they used for years. All he was really doing was tweaking it. It was getting stale.

In October, we made a decision that it was time for him to focus on his project, complete it, and sell it. (With financial support.) Well, you know that feeling you get in your stomach when you know you are doing the right thing, but you still are almost paralyzed with fear. Yep. That's been me. I have this sub-theme to my life, a lesson, I keep having to learn over and over. To TRUST the Lord. Trust that things well work out.

Well, We're about 3/4 the way through this tunnel here. I am starting to see the light at the end. It's really exciting. Of course, I'm still waiting for a huge log to fall on my tunnel and squish me. But, I can feel the knot in my stomach loosening ever so slightly.

My point. In life, we have to take risks- intelligent, well thought out, well planned risks. I never regret it. Those difficult, but right decisions have lead me down paths that have added value, uniqueness, meaning, and color to my life. I have so much more to offer now. I guess my only regret is that I spend half of the time hiding in my shell waiting for the next tree to crash on me rather than simply enjoying the amazing adventure.